My name is Alison.
When I was 8 years old, I had my first panic attack at recess.
When I was 9 years old, I hid in the closet of my family’s home and thought everything would be better if I just disappeared from everyone’s lives.
When I was 12, I didn’t want to get out of bed or go to school.
When I was 14, my exasperated mom finally dragged me to the doctor’s office. It was then that the doctor put a name to my problems – Depression and Anxiety.
Hearing this diagnosis was hard, but dealing with the actual condition has been harder. It’s been over 10 years since this diagnosis, but putting my life back together is still a work in progress. How do you build a happy life when all you’ve ever known is fear and sadness? How do you shake something that has been with you as long as you can remember?
This blog was made to document my long road to recovery. For the last 5 years, I’ve been relearning how to think about myself and where I stand in the world. My 20’s have been a journey of finding love, losing love, and trying to find myself. They’ve been about coming to terms with my past, looking at my life at what it is, and trying to carve out a small piece of happiness, as imperfect as things may be.
I am not a counselor, nor do I have training in psychology. But I truly hope, if nothing else, that my story can help people who have been struggling with Depression. I have been there. The path to recovery might not be a perfect one, but it’s a beautiful one.